Vala to Mitchell: I know we haven't met. That, I'm sure I would remember.

Cameron: Ladies first.
Vala to Jackson: Well then, after you.

Vala to Teal'c: Give it a try, Muscles. I'll give you half.

Vala: I haven't been this disappointed since I had sex with Daniel.

Vala trying to reassure Jackson about Teal'c and Mitchell's fate: Look, I didn't hear any screaming or squishing sounds, so...

Daniel: Isn't that why we're doing this, all of this? The Stargate program. So we can meet new races, gather advanced technology, possibly learn about ourselves in the process.
Vala: Oh c'mon. You do it to meet women.
Cameron: She has a point, sir.

Vala: I've got tingles all over. And don't flatter yourself. I'm pretty sure it's not you.

Vala: I don't think enlightenment means what they think it means.

Vala: You two aren't gonna let people from two different worlds beat you at your own silly game are you?

Daniel: Just try to be—
Vala: What? My charming self?
Daniel: A little less talk, a little more shut the hell up.

Vala to her daughter: Are you actually going to stop growing at some point?
Vala: You know, I never thought I'd agree with my father but now I'm starting to remember about how he used to go about, you nurture them, and you raise them, and you teach them the best that you can, and then all they do is break your heart. I always assumed that his experience was just tainted by me.
Daniel: What are you talking about?
Vala: Wow. She started off all sweet and innocent and now she's hellbent on domination of the galaxy.
Daniel: What? How old is she?
Vala: A few hours. The Ori used me to sneak one of their own over the border.
Daniel: This is bad.
Vala: You're telling me. Origin is about to become much more appealing to the males of this galaxy.

Vala is off to use Jackson's computer to study for her psych test
Daniel: I said no. And you can't access it without my password!
Vala: Already got it, thanks!

Landry: You can't cram for a psychiatric evaluation.
Vala: That's what they want you to think.

Dr. Hutchinson: Vala. I'm Dr. Hutchinson. Have a seat. So, how are you feeling?
Vala: Very well. Very well. Well you know all things considered. I mean you'd assume I'd be a prime candidate for aculturation difficulty, enduring feelings of displacement and alienation. Perhaps even a little paranoid ideation. The truth is I was able to adopt an abstract attitude, which allowed me to release some of my repressed feelings, ultimately providing me with a cathartic actualization. How are you feeling?

About Vala taking the lie detector test
Hutchinson: Try to relax. an aside You're looking very nice today.
Vala: Oh. Thank you. You're looking rather dashing yourself.
Hutchinson: Thanks. realizes the detector is signaling a false answer. So does Vala.
Vala: I mean, nice. no change I mean, not objectionable.

Woolsey: I'm assuming things didn't go well.
Vala: I fail to see the point of that ridiculous exercise. Unless it's purpose was to thoroughly humiliate me. Those questions weren't intended to shed light on my character or delve deeply into my subconscience. They were merely little reminders as to exactly why I don't belong here.
Woolsey: Then I take it you've carefully considered our offer and come to a decision.
Vala: I have.
Vala: As my first official act I'd like to report a rather disagreeable little man.
Woolsey: That'd be me.
Landry: Mr. Woolsey's offer was part of the test. We wanted to make sure we could trust you.
Vala: I knew that. But were his sexual advance part of the test?
Woolsey: What? That's a— General, I can assure you.
Vala: Well, I would have even considered playing along, but some of his requests were, well, a little unusual. Even for me.

Vala: Listen, we're not rejoining the fleet. You're coming with me.
Adria: No. I can't abandon my army.
Vala: It's not your army.
Adria: Of course it is.
Vala: Well as your mother I'm putting my foot down. You're too young to have an army.

Daniel: Dinner tonight is my way of saying Thank you. Thank you for proving me right when I said we could take a chance on you.
Vala: I don't know what to say.
Daniel: Just say what you were going to say before I interrupted.
Vala: Okay. I need to use the bathroom.

Trust Minion: How are you feeling?
Vala: A little dizzy. A little tired. And very very angry.
Trust Minion: That's because the flashbacks you're experiencing are dredging up some long-buried emotions that are coloring your subconscious mind.
Vala: I'm going to kill both of you in the most painful way possible.

Cameron: Where are we going?
Vala: Just drive.
Cameron: You know I'm bleeding here.
Vala: Shut up.

Vala: What are you doing?
Cameron: Trying to see if I still have both my kidneys.

Vala: What's this?
Landry: Let's just call it a Welcome Back present.
Vala: These are—
Landry: Team badges. You're now officially a member of SG-1.
Carter: Congratulations. You earned it.

Cameron: Yep. She's a real beauty.
Vala: Stabilizers are a bit wonky, I'm afraid. Makes for a bumpy ride. But it's all perfectly safe.
Cameron: Really?
Vala: Not exactly.
Daniel: We gave you as much raw naquadah as you needed and all you came up with was this piece of junk?
Vala: People's lives are at stake, Daniel. Do you honestly think that I cheaped out on the ship and pocketed the difference? an alarm goes off
Cameron: What's that?
Vala: Life support seems to be failing. to Teal'c Can you take over? changes crystals and the alarm stops
Cameron: Great, you fixed that. How about fixing the stabilizers?
Vala: Oh, I didn't fix anything. I just disabled that annoying alarm.

Vala: The key is to be as inconspicuous and non-threatening as possible. If you like I could take Daniel.

Jacek: Sweetheart! How is life treating you?
Vala: Certainly better than you ever did.

Vala: So where are the boys tonight?
Carter: Cameron has a date, Daniel is exhausted. And Teal'c got tickets to some show...

Vala: Being stuck on this ship is worse than being stuck at SGC. I tell you last time I was this bored I took prisoners.
Daniel: I was there.

Vala about the Asgard: Out of curiosity, how can you tell the difference?
Daniel: The voice.

Vala to Daniel: I'm gonna go crazy. And I'm taking you with me.

Vala: I'm hearing things all the time. Are you hearing things?
Teal'c: I am trying not to.

Cameron: What are you, 130 now?
Vala: I don't know. He doesn't look a day over 120 to me.

Vala: 50 or 60 years? Something interesting must have happened. Obviously I hooked up with someone. Was it you, Muscles?